This Is Not What I Ordered...

I served Selah her dinner about a week ago- and that is what she said. "This is not what I ordered". Not in an ugly way- she was sweet and sincere and had a respectful tone.

I served her some light turkey sausage(that's a hot dog at our house) and some corn. Her favorite. But she said, "This is not what I ordered. I wanted a broccoli taco."

OK-now I know. I need just to tell God- this is not what I ordered!!!!!!!

So- here it goes. And I have to be honest- as I am writing and praying, I am "crying my eyeballs off" as Selah would say.

Dear Jesus-
I am praying this with a sweet spirit. This is really not what I ordered. I am not angry. I know you love me. I know I am very blessed in so many ways. I thank you Jesus that my husband is so wonderful, that you have blessed us with two amazing girls. Thank you that my husband loves his job and that You have provided for us. Thank you Jesus.
But this is not what I ordered. I ordered to be south! Close to our families- close to my sweet mom. I want to be near her. Dad was just in the hospital- nothing major, but I couldn't be with him Jesus. I miss friends that you have knit me together with. I miss my church family- I miss them more than words and tears can describe.
Jesus, you know Skylar has close friends in two southern states- good kids that God placed in her life from wonderful families. Do you know how hard it is for a teenager to move in a span of two years? Yes you do , I know. I am reminded of all of the military families- my heart goes out to them. I know I need to appreciate the sacrifices those families make for our freedom- not just in battle- but in day to day living. Please Lord be with them.
We passed this moving test once. Please Lord- could I have what I ordered? And close proximity to a Harris Teeter or a Publix would be nice. Just kidding, kind of- a smiling, familiar face in at the grocery counter means a lot more to me now Jesus. Sorry I took that one for granted.

Jesus- I love you and I thank you that I can be real with you always. I know you love me too. You love us all so much! Thanks for all you do in spite of my shortfalls. And thank you for listening. I 'm so glad that you are always with me. Thank you sweet Holy Spirit for comforting me.
And thanks Jesus for reminding me, just now, what I ordered.
"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4
You are my Portion.
In your name I pray Jesus. Amen


If you are wondering if I gave in and fixed Selah a broccoli taco- I didn't. I can't remember if she ate her "hot dog" at this very moment- but I think she finally did.

It is a hard lesson for us to learn isn't- even as adults. Sometimes we don't get what we ordered, or what we think we ordered! Our loving Daddy in heaven is not trying to torture us. He loves us and knows what's best.

He tells us not to complain(Phil 2:14). You know why? It doesn't do you or anyone else around you any good. And it doesn't get you what you ordered. Talk to Him instead. He is a really good listener, I promise.

He tells us to rejoice (Phil 4:4)- always. Ok I am- but is it cool to rejoice with tears? Yes, He said. I know Jesus understands tears- He shed some for you and me one night in a garden. I can't forget those. You just don't need to let those tears take you away from His purpose...

He tells us that He is our strength (Psalm 18:2).

And- that if we are seeking Him- we will not miss Him (2 Chronicles 15:2)

He can use you anywhere.

He is everywhere
and He knows everything.

And He loves us with an incomprehensible love. His love for us is the driving force behind His every move and has been since before time began.

As our pastor reminded us- we are not on a cruise ship playing shuffle board. We are on a battle field. And if you are praying for the Lord to use you... sometimes it is not easy.

But Lord- I just want to tell you- I know it is worth it.

Praising Him and no longer crying my eyeballs off-jananne

Sweeter Than Honey

Psalm 119:103
How sweet are thy words unto my taste! Yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth!
Now you know honey is sweet!

I have learned two things from my little Selah. One- everything is better drenched in honey. Everything. The other epiphany – just as important in her little world- all clothes must spin (but that is another post all together).

I just want to encourage you today. His Words are healing balm. Sweeter than anything this world has to offer.

Several years ago, my marriage was in real danger. My mother was diagnosed with the highest degree of cancer. I had a new job working about 60 hours a week and I had a small child. I had little hope.

One of my mentors, Kenny Jenkins, from Covenant Church in Greenville, shared with me that there were unclaimed promises in His Word. He told me to read the Word and God would reveal them to me.

We all walk through trials in this world. The Word does not say if, it says when!

“When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.” Isaiah 43:2

I had tried self help books- conferring with friends, secular counselors-focusing on the “positive”. All those avenues led me to the same place, they might have worked short term- but after awhile I was still a mess.

There is a blessed hope. (Titus 2:13).

Now, over ten years later- I can share that I have learned to stand on His Word, not on circumstances or opinions of well intentioned others. His Word will never fail you.

I know this. I have seen it manifested in our lives.

Here are a few of the promises I have realized through the power of His Word which is all powerful(Hebrew 4:12):

A peaceful habitation… Isaiah 32:18
Forgiveness …Luke 17:4, Col 3:13
A peace during severe storms and peace in just day to day living that is incomprehensible in the flesh...John 14:27
Healing from cancer, infertility, insecurity... 1 Peter 2:24, James 5:16… Luke 8:47, Psalm 37:4
Deliverance from addictions! ...Matt 17:20-21
Deliverance from fear… Mark 5:36
Protection …Psalm 28:7, Psalm 91
Power over the enemy …Luke 10:19
Development of faith …Luke 12:28
Assurance that it is all right, even when all things are not right!...Mark 4:37-41

I could go on and on!!! He is your ever present help Psalm 46:1!

There is no other explanation – He is sovereign, His Word is powerful! Read it and see- taste the sweetness that is sweeter than honey!

BEE drenched in the Word!

Praising Him-jananne

Glory to Glory

Glory to Glory
2 Corinthians 3:18

But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.

Going from glory to glory requires leaving glory.

God never closes one door without opening another door, but as my pastor has shared, it's hell in the hallway!

I am learning that going through something doesn't mean necessarily that the devil is messing with you- God just might be up to something. Have you been craving more of His presence in your life? Hold on, chances are there is a breaking coming.

Pastor Ricardo recently shared insight into a scripture that immediately connected with my spirit. In Matthew 14:16-21, Jesus told the disciples to feed the crowd. He first blessed the bread and then He BROKE the bread. There was a breaking before the sending, before the miracle. We like to live in the blessing, it is not so fun to be broken.

I want to encourage you today if you are broken or you are in the process of breaking. There is hope. There is supernatural Superglue! He will put you back together again in a miraculous way if you will let Him. This season you are going through has a purpose. It is so you (and I) will be changed into His image.

I want to be real- it is not an easy thing to go through and all hell may come against you because the enemy knows that the Kingdom is advancing when there is brokenness. You may be tempted to crawl into bed and stay there. You may hear the enemy whispering things- your life is over, your marriage is over,your children's future is ruined, you'll never..., your best days are over.

Now it is time to party- when you hear those lies- RECOGNIZE the enemy and start whirling the Word back...

No weapon formed against my family will prosper. I know you have plans for us and I pray that each one is fulfilled. I will be thankful in all things. Shake those things from me that are not of You! You know how I should act and think Lord- reign in my mind. I know you are there. I know you will never leave me. I know you will rescue me. I pray you are glorified. I praise you Lord!You are the source of my joy! Isaiah 54:17. Jeremiah 29:11, Hebrews12:27, 1Thessalonians 5:18, Job 12:13,Hebrews 13:5, Psalm 107:28-29

Please surround yourself with Jonathan friends that don't feed into your carnal fears.


I recommend fasting and prayer during this season. Remember fasting is all about getting closer to God- aligning our will, with His perfect will and living in His presence.

Leaving Georgia was hard- arriving to NJ was harder. I don't know why we are here in NJ- but we are and I have two choices. I can be depressed and concentrate on the dozen or so low end hotels and two major highways that are right across the street from our home here in NJ, while I reflect about our church I miss so much, our friends I miss so much, and remember the cows, goats and rolling hills that surrounded us in GA,

or

I can think about the opportunities God has for us here.
I have to be intentional.

God shares with us in Psalm 51 that He wants our thanks- He has mine. He wants His promises fulfilled in our lives. Whew- we are on the same page! And then He adds, I want you to call me in your times of trouble so I can rescue you and you can give me glory!

Call on Him.

I want to share one personal story that gives Him glory. We have survived two job losses this year- TWO. We have been blessed during this past year in ways I cannot even describe. The entire family has definitely grown closer to Jesus- no doubt! We, despite two job loses have paid off debt and my husband has a new, used car that is paid for. God has been intentional to place some solid Christian friends in our lives. He has strengthened relationships with our brothers and sisters in Christ, despite miles that may separate us. Blessings, blessings, blessings.

Then, at the end of the 2008, we were hit with news of an appraisal for our house in GA that was $77,000 dollars less than we paid for it. Our builder in GA had apparently gone under during our relocation process. This would result in a balance of $27,000 owed to the bank if we accepted the buy out from the relocation company. We were told that there was little hope that anything else could be done. We also had to come up with another house payment, in addition to the rent in NJ(which by the way is much higher than our house payment in GA), until everyone involved figured out what to do. We are living in different times my friends- but that is another post, another day. This was the second month we were making a rent payment and a house payment. As you can imagine- things didn't look good. Were we literally facing fore closer or bankruptcy- what is this going to do to the girls future???

But I was reminded- our God is still in the miracle business. He is supernatural. I called my prayer partner mom and along with her faith filled prayers, I literally cried out to Him last Tuesday night- more like a scream- Jesus, I know you are there- I know you have plans for us and I pray that they are fulfilled. Help us- we are at the end of our rope- we need you! I have faith that you will fix this. I thanked Him and then my family and I went to an amusement park- right down the street(yes, we are surrounded by hotels, discount liquor stores, a toll station, bus stop, gas station, truck stop and an amusement park!!!) We had a wonderful evening. I did not let the enemy trick me.

I will tell you that prayer was answered last night in a way that only could be God. Didn't come in the form of a family gift...or a lottery ticket. He is our lottery ticket! He has taken care of our financial needs concerning the rent and the house payment duo! He is an on time God.

Make sure you call on Him. Glory is coming!

An Invitation, Living in His Presence

December 18,2008
Driving north on 85. Away from Atlanta. Away from our church, away from our friends. My eyes are swollen from the tears. Remember His faithfulness I keep saying to myself.
Crossing into South Carolina, I hear little Selah…
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus??
Mom, He can’t hear me.
Yes He can, close your eyes and pray to Him. I know that He will let you know that He hears your prayers. Under my breath- Lord, please let her know that You hear her.

Skylar and I tuned into her prayer, having no idea what she was about to pray…

Dear Lord, dear Lord, please forgive me. Save me from the Lake of Fire. Come live in my heart. I want to live with you in heaven. Best of all, I want to play with you and be with you. Bless me from the tweep of my toes to the tweep of my bottom. Amen.

How precious. What a memory to have crossing over. What a message of His continuous goodness. More tears- but all good. All about Him.

An Invitation, Living in His Presence

Earlier that morning, Selah had heard Skylar and me talking about Heaven. Selah was surprised to learn that not everybody goes to heaven. That must have gone deeper into her than I realized. I have never talked to her about salvation. We talk about His love and about how He wants us to choose blessings and not cursings…But she heard His truth and must have felt a nudge from our sweet Holy Spirit and she accepted His invitation. I know she is three- but she gets it, I am sure. If you know Selah, you know, she gets it.

Saved, saved from what? Saved from the eternal lake of fire that no one wants to think about. Saved from a lifestyle that will cause pain and take you away from His love and goodness.
How can a God who is love send me to a lake of fire? He doesn’t- you send yourself.

Saved, how can I be saved? Not by how good you are, but by a choice you make to accept His invitation. His light and presence are available to you.

There is no shadow in His presence. No shadow? What does that mean? When you are surrounded by His light and He lives in you, you are changed. Not about a list of I can’ts, or I have tos- but you will be transformed by the power of His blood!

His power is transforming- that means life changing. You are not the same. And the closer you get to Him, the more you become like Him. The things in this world will lose their flavor- your appetite will be for more of Him. You’ll crave the Son, and the more you experience Him, the more of the old you will burn off.

What does more of Him mean? More peace, more love, more miracles, more healing and the favor of His presence will be upon you.

Does it mean I won’t have problems? No.

Does it mean I won’t have sadness? No.

Does it mean that the devil will leave you alone? Certainly not.

It does mean that you will have supernatural power supplied by God almighty through His son and the gift of the Holy Spirit, who dwells in each believer, who accepts the Savior as Lord of their lives to deal with everything the world is throwing at you!

You will get through it. Your attitude will be different. Your hope will be alive.


If you are still breathing, He has a plan for you and He has extended an invitation to you.

Another reality check- there a lot of folks that go to church that are not saved. I grew up in the church and I was not born again until after the birth of Skylar in 1994. I did church things, read churchy books, talked about God- but I didn’t know Him as Savior.

Have you accepted Him as your Savior- are you experiencing His supernatural transformation?

It is not about legalism. It is not about religion- it is about His presence in you. Bring an offering of worship to the King, who was born of a virgin, in a manger, died on a cross and rose on the third day. He is alive and He has given you an invitation to spend eternity with Him.

You might have a lot of party invitations this holiday season, or maybe you don’t. But everyone has been given one invitation.

Jesus was sent to earth so that you could have an invitation into His presence.

What party are you going to? You have a choice. He paid a price and He has a wonderful table set for you!

If you want to be transformed and accept the invitation to the best holiday party in town, pray this prayer:
Jesus, I believe that you were born of a virgin, died on the cross and rose on the third day. I confess that I am a sinner and I ask for your forgiveness. I acknowledge that there is no other way into Your presence but by the penalty you paid on the cross of Calvary. I want Your Spirit to dwell in me. I want You to be Lord of my life. I want Your peace, love and truth in every aspect of my being. I want to spend eternity with You.

If you prayed that prayer, sincerely, please contact me gzusnut@yahoo.com. I’m already praying for you.
Merry Christmas,
jananne

Merry Christmas 2008

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Here I Am

This journey to New Jersey has been a "growing in Him" experience for us. And you know with growing, there are growing pains! A few months ago, I was at the altar at our church in Georgia- amy prayer was "Lord, I want every blessing that you have for me."

Now, the world's idea of blessing and His idea of blessing can be very different!

I was saying to the Lord, I want You to work in me- I want Your ways, Your plans fulfilled, Your purpose for me executed!!! His ways are always higher than our ways! Isaiah 55:9. I said, "Here I am Lord, send me". Now He is sending!

You may have heard this song on Christian radio recently. The words have spoken to my heart and spirit. I pray you enjoy these words and that they minister to you in some way.

HERE I AM

 by downhere

to listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JH1iYDWN3Ic

Sometimes Your calling, comes in a dream

Sometimes it comes in the Spirit's breeze,

You reach for the deepest part of me,

And call out for the things of eternity.

But I'm a man, of dust and stains,

You move in me, so I can say,

CHORUS:

Here I am, Lord send me,

All of my life, I make an offering,

Here I am, Lord send me,

Somehow my story, Is part of Your plan,

Here I am

When setbacks and failures, and upset plans,

Test my faith and leave me with empty hands,

Are You not the closest when it's hardest to stand?

I know that You will finish what you began.

These broken parts You redeem,

Become the song, that I can sing

(chorus)

Overwhelmed by the thought of my weakness,

And the fear that I'll fail You in the end,

In this mess, I'm just one of the pieces,

I can't put this together but You can.

Here I Am, all my life an offering to You,

Somehow my story is a part of Your plan

Here I am

Irreversible Change

 
















I shared this in 2008, but was prompted today to reread it myself! The transformation He promises is REAL! Above, is a painting I did for my sister's birthday card, many years ago. All about transformation...

So here is the 2008 post- enjoy!

Recently, Selah and I were studying irreversible change. We made applesauce to understand this concept. Selah tried to mash the raw apples and just got “frustrating”, as she would say. Then we placed the apples in a pot and added some heat. She was able to mash the apples and after adding cinnamon and butter, we had delicious applesauce.
As we enjoyed our applesauce, I couldn't help but think how we are constantly being “irreversibly changed” to be more like Him (Philippians 1:6). We need some mashing and some sweetness, from the love and heat of the Son!
I can imagine that those apples got really hot over that fire. Do you know that fire is a symbol of God’s power, presence and protection (see: Psalm 104:4, Jeremiah 20:9, Matthew 3:11, Luke 3:17 and Daniel 3:6)?
Are you over a flame right now? Sometimes He allows us to go through fire to be changed, to glorify His Kingdom. Getting hot, really hot, is not a lot of fun. It is not comfortable, you may not “feel” His presence and you may just feel the Son-burn!!! But you can be assured that He is there (Hebrews 13:5). We are often put in situations that require His strength, beyond anything we could do on our own. Sometimes it is a process of burning away what does not belong (Luke 3:17). My pastor shared recently that faith never dulls feelings. You can have tremendous faith- but your flesh may still be hurting. We must stay in the Word- it is life, make it a priority. Surround yourself with Scripture on index cards, sticky notes and carry a Bible with you everywhere! Search His book for promises. Stay connected to people that encourage you, not those that feed into or stir up fear or negativity! Continue to praise Him with every breath you take. I am sure there have been many people whom I have crossed paths with recently who think I talk to myself- but I have a praise in my mouth at all times!!!! Have an attitude of praise on your lips, in your step and in your spirit. That is a choice, not something that just happens. Death and life are in the tongue - so speak life from His Word into your situation (Proverbs 18:21). Do not believe the lies that the enemy will whisper or shout to you. If you are in a Goliath situation, praise will break the enemies hold! Greater is He that is in you than He that is in the world (1 John 4:4)!!! You will eventually see how His power, presence and protection carried you through the fire, when you do, be sure to give Him the glory.
A dragonfly is born colorless underwater. Once the dragonfly comes out of the water and emerges into light (and heat) of the sun, it changes and becomes colorful. Don’t you want to experience the transforming power of the Son?
Once we believe that Jesus died on Calvary for our sins and we ask Him to come into our hearts and reign as Lord of our life, you can be assured that you will change. Remember, it is a process (Philippians 1:6). Surrender daily! The end result will be beautiful and sweet. That is His promise.

Be Patient, James 5:7

I painted this pumpkin several years ago- and just today touched him up! As seasons are changing...I am in a season of being patient, as my husband and I discern God's will for the next move for our family.

When we have a vision that involves God's plans, we cannot expect to be able to achieve it on our own. Whew. God we need you.
And somehow I know that whatever His plan is for our lives- it involves sharing His love with others.

 "But life is not worth anything unless I use it for doing the work of telling others the good news about God's mighty kindness and love." Acts 20:24 TLB

How can you do that in your everyday walk? Use what gifts He has given you! Be available to the adversity and sometimes, inconveniences, that come from following after the True Prize! We are not all called to pastor! In everyday living, whether you are a student, a teacher, an athlete, a doctor, a grocery store cashier...God has gifted you in a special way to build His kingdom.  If you are not sure what your dream is, spend more time with Jesus! He has a plan for you! God knew you before you were formed(Psalm 139)- He predestined us all to be in a relationship with Him, if we chose. You are so special to Him that He knows how many hairs are on your head (Matthew 10:30)! Seek His dream for your life- trust Him and with His help- be patient as your God sized dream comes true!

So, as my family and I wait to find out- whether we are staying in Georgia or moving to NJ, Florida, or Nashville...we are thanking Him for all things!!!

Praising Him Patiently! jananne

Garment of Praise

How many of us ask, "why"? Why did I get that doctor's report? Why is my child struggling? Why is the economy in a mess? Why do I feel like everything is falling apart? Why did my husband lose his job? Look at the women in the painting, Garment of Praise, Isaiah 61:3.

Recently my friend Tonya shared with me how the Lord spoke to her heart about the Why? He told her, turn your why into a Y of praise. I didn't know then, how much I would appreciate that message. See, our sweet Jesus has a remedy for everything. He has given us the garment of praise for our heaviness(Isaiah 61:3). The enemy cannot inhabit your praises. Only Jesus!!!! Read 2 Chronicles 20 and discover how King Jehoshaphat turned on the praise! Notice something else in that account(this is a true story, you know!) In 2 Chronicles 20:12, this king admitted, we don't know what to do, the enemy is too big for us to deal with! Can you relate in 2008!!! And then added, "BUT OUR EYES ARE ON YOU GOD!" Praise, prayer,fasting and faith led King Jehoshaphat into victory! His enemies turned on each other! GOD FOUGHT THE BATTLE FOR HIM! When your arms are lifted up in praise, they cannot hold the weapons of anger, bitterness and un-forgiveness. Let Him fight for you- He'll win every time.

Keep your arms lifted to Him. Praise Him continually. I have started keeping praise music on in my house all the time- even at night- I might turn the volume down- but there are praises to Jesus going through my home 24/7. I also am learning how to have an attitude of praise. I cannot complain about a circumstance if I am living in continual praise (see Philippians 2:13).

So praise Him no matter what the circumstance may look like, Jesus is working behind the scenes. And remember, He will take the road that brings Him the most glory- that is our delight and our comfort.

Praising Him-jananne

Sour Apple Sweet Savior

Selah and I recently investigated apples! I know, it is not quite apple picking season- but we were singing A- A, Adam...!!!! My teacher friends understand!!!! Part of our fun was to taste four different varieties of apples. Selah "predicted" that the red delicious apple would be the sweetest. She was right, of course! When she tasted the Granny Smith apple- her lips puckered and she said in her sweet "free" (3)year old voice,"That is sooooo sour!" The Holy Spirit prompted me to cut the apple in half. I asked Selah, "What do you see?" "A Star!" she replied. I told her that Jesus was our Morning Star. We studied how the star resembled the cross. I reminded her of how sour the apple had been. Sometimes that is how we act. Selah calls this acting yucky! We are a lot like that sour apple- but we have a sweet Savior on the inside named Jesus, who died on the cross for our "yuckiness". I want her to be reminded in all things what our sweet Savior did for us!

After our special apple tasting time. I took the apple pieces and soaked them in salt water so they would not turn "yucky". I thought- we must soak in the salt so we don't turn "yucky"!!! We need to be at our best and full of His flavor to be His light in a dying world.

Salt [is] good: but if the salt have lost His saltness, wherewith will ye season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace one with another. Mark 9:50

God Bless you all. Praising Him like no one is watching-jananne

Encourage One Another

I am so thankful to the Holy Spirit, who teaches me daily, inspires me hourly... The painting, Encourage One Another, is a favorite of mine. We all need sheltering trees! Friends in our lives that will get down on their knees and lift us up to our King Jesus! This painting was inspired by the Holy Spirit as I was encouraged by one of my dearest friends, Sarah, who encourages me often with His Word and her intercessory prayers.
Be blessed as you encourage others! jananne

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